Forget Me Not

"You are in my every wish. Your essence lies in every prayer that I make. In the ocean where I am drowning alone, tears with your names in them lie blended. The rising tides and falling health doesn’t disassemble my love, my love for you. You still pulsate in my veins with a rhythm that has always fascinated me. The deepness in your eyes still overpowers my visions and prevents me to face the reality; the reality, in which your fingers don’t fill spaces between mine; the reality, which you chose to gift me with. And in this reality too, mirrors reflect me as the one which I used to be years back. Only innocence I have lost, my child in me I have lost…Our child we have lost."

"I don’t blame you, I blame me. I blame the God who diverted our paths in a way that our journey became different. I blame the flowers that sucked our emotions from us. I blame that jealous breeze which couldn’t synchronize with the melody that our conversations used to bring. I blame that rainbow which shied from the vibgyor our smiles created together after we ended our quarrels. And I blame those every moment which envied me and fought with me, carried away you so far; so far that I am afraid to consider if we will ever meet again." 

"This day owns a snap of yours in me, in a corner of my heart which is invincible. My lifeline runs through those veins whose walls have impressions of that snap. The air I breathe circulates and preserves your belongings inside me. I continue to live for I have promised few memoirs that I will make things better; those things that weren’t at place earlier which made us part. I have to contemplate; I have to succeed those paths I wasn’t aware of earlier. Your lost possessiveness for me gives me strength, and I move on. I move on to be a man that you would have thought I must be. And I pray for your wellbeing, for your happy sun gleaming. This day is special for me, because you were meant to be a part of me…always!"




-An Imaginary Cloud's note that was dying to burst

Read More →

Eternal Beauty

I admire the beauty if it exists, which would depict an inheritance of my individuality, amidst my blanked out identity; a kind that belongs to me, an accomplice to my soul's anatomy.
Like the pearls shine, white and pure, still unnoticed, subdued in disdain, my beauty lies coated.
I wait, with pains stitched through patience; I don’t bleed like the pearls don’t sweat.
I wait; someday a soul mate will come to plow the sand dunes, to take away the pearls that lie on the way. Then I will be sculptured near someone’s heart, like the pearls will necklace around with love.

I admire the beauty if it exists, which would let me see even when there prevails the darkest dark.
Like the fireflies blink, some far and some near, a timid melody blinks my mind and says a beauty stand by me. I look; with thrills sailing in my veins, drums percussing on my chest, I search the truth in twilight.
I look through my open window, where fluorescence enters and fills emptiness in my eyes. And there I witness a beauty in disguise.

Why a beauty hides in disguise? Why not it pulsates and waves its original vibes? For if beauty is veritable, why doesn’t it finds its accomplice. Why it remains lost and hitches in hands of dust. The extent of hitches has furthered its boundary. My every lookup, every searching ends at obscured vicinity. I lie dormant with no trace for my pair.

Now I want to announce that beauty doesn’t exist. But my heart foolish throbs for it; few impressions of illusions lie forged on the walls. Like the pearls burn in heat under the weight of sand dunes, I glow in flames driven by hopes in my eyes. I want to end my hopes too. But still...
Still, when the heat around churns to near death, snoring thunder in sky reminds of beauty in rains.
And then evokes admirations for a soul mate, who will wash away the heat, and pick up the pearls. I will be sculptured too near someone’s heart, like the pearls will necklace around with love...
                                                                                       
                                                                                        ....And the search for eternal beauty continues

Read More →

An Engineered Snap

I wanted to be an Engineer…But I couldn't get a reputed college. :(
Engineering is one of the most sought branches of education that Indian students prefer. And from the state where I belong to, Bihar, it’s a culture there to dream about getting into IITs, right from the time when students are in their secondary school level classes. But due to huge cutoff of marks, from some reservation related disheartening pricks and because of few cases of bad luck, dreams don’t turn into reality, and such dreams get homed in million hearts with a forget me not note. I happened to be one of them who have faced this. But IITs can never be the ultimate destination. The talent and capabilities you gather through studying Engineering is what the ultimate destination is.

What you had thought? Engineering is going to be so easy?
Once you get into an Engineering college, your hard time starts. The time gets hard because students turn cruel towards themselves, towards their dreams. A stay away from home, with cheers from friends and handful cigarettes with brownish ends, they tip toe on the path they assume to be amusing. With few more inputs, rises addiction; new areas of conversation, new heights of incision. Grooming yourself the right way among such a culture which gallantly exists in Engineering Colleges can be hectic. But it’s a task you must accomplish. Apart from this, other major bullets fired on students comprise from the gun of ‘Time Management’. You need to do loads of things – Classes, Practicals, Projects, Presentations, Assignments, Movies, Outings, Counter Strike matches, Love-Affairs and innumerable other things too. And if you still get some time left from 24 hours well, then you self-study.  Cruel time span when ill managed, it curses students very bad. :( Life inside, when looked from outside, always look magnificent. But the inside story is totally different. If you are an Engineer or an Engineering student then you would be knowing this very well. :P

You must get to know me…Warna main aathon semester tak tumhara jeena haram kar dunga…

You do whatever you like. You can also afford not to study and get few backs in some semester papers. But kindly never get into any kind of trouble with any of your college’s professors/lecturers. :D
This is the first proposition that you must know before you enter into an Engineering college. If you consider not to follow this regulation, then very soon you will get know the setbacks in one way or the other. It is proven and tested formula. :D

Life is full of fun and learning too...

Keeping the bad things aside, let’s look the bright side of life in an Engineering college. The four years will sweep out like the sand escapes from your grip. Lot many numbers of mistakes you will realize and they will form learning and experiences for you. Jerks and shocks make you walk on edgy rocks. Moments of fun do come; may be huge, or maybe it could be some. But at the end of four years I am sure that you will make a collage; a collage of fun you had, not the hardships you faced.

I am going to make a collage too when I end my fourth year. I am still in the middle of my journey; two more years are yet to go. I wish to live my life to the fullest here. :)

Read More →

SCATHE

In your stream of meanings, my being in them has changed. In fake hives where your verity lies, your words for me have changed.

Your bare hands I used to hold, tender and soft, in my bask cajoled. In young gloves of perfidy, yours hold on mine has changed.

For grooves in your hair brown, new fingers you have arranged. In shade of blue in your eyes, impressions of mine black have changed.

In all these time skips, trend on your lips, for my name has changed. Beats for me, the place for me in your heart has changed.

Honey! I am still the same; a harebrained, your lover insane. Every knock on my heart sees you, your existence unchanged.

My arms still lie open, to have you back in them. My lungs lie dormant with smoke, looking for your breathe to inhale, to grasp your love unchanged.

I care not where you have reached; I am still there where you left. I am waiting for you in my life deranged, caressing my angel, in your photo unchanged.

Read More →

Untitled Love

The wind had smell

A propitious flavor to inhale

When the sky wasn’t blue

Walked there an angel

Her wings were glowing too

A girl in pink

I was in love... I think!

Her golden earrings dance

Blew my mind, lost in trance

Coiffed were her hair brown

And her smoky eyes frown

Often showed dulcet blink

I was in love... I think!

She moved forth

My heart followed

Acting like a tween

People around stood still

Cut in yellow, carmine and green

Then came a symphony  sync

I was in love... I think!

A call, her phone said

Her feet tiptoed, lips moved

Bright red, on the white bed

I saw her finger; a jewel blazing

A kinship; a wedding ring glaring

Sank my heart tween

And even at its bursting brink

I was in love... I think!

Vanished the smell and its flavor

The sky turned back blue

No wings to do the favor

People moved, started the rite

Path trodden, in black & white

No tears! Just little eyes shrink

But I was in love... I think!

Read More →

I Am The God

They are all voids
Where you lay,
Shallow are the rivulets
Where you play,
Where the light is faint
And every heart has dent,
Where the honesty is said rude
And cruelty implies being dude.
Do you remember,
The last window you broke?
Not with stones;
With words you spoke.
You have worked hard
And turned rich,
You followed the ways
That preached the leech.
You built ‘homes’ for yourselves,
And ‘houses’ for elderly.
But your homes have voids
And there you lay,
Shallow are the rivulets
And there you play.

You printed my preaching,
Gathered them in Bible
In Gita and Quran,
And raged wars in babel.
I had loved you all,
Never let you ever fall.
I wonder about the courage
You packed in your luggage,
And about the demons you gather,
You turn devilish and raging
And disloyal to your father.
I watch you all
Like a film in a roll,
You haven’t reached heights
And still survive in a burrow.
Your home still have voids
And there you lay,
Shallow are the rivulets,
And there you play….

[I wrote this for Blognostics long ago. I shared it now on my own site. :)]

Read More →

Phoning Myself...

Hovering scorns have to be kept aside

With a gush of jolt, 

Determination we must abide.

We have wished to see the unseen,

We can't look back now,

It won’t show the path we mean.

The flow can’t bowel us in his swirls,

We have the courage now,

To pamper the force in its watery grills.

Let our goal caress us on every side,

Let’s wake up now,

And get prepared for the ride,

Our pack exists being the best lets think

And move on to face the powerful tide.

How high it will go, surely we don’t know,

But keep up the will that we have to glow,

We have to show.

Let’s bring back some smiles

From few distant miles;

Let’s set ourselves to bring back the glory,

Let’s join hands to recreate the theory.

We can do very well,

No matter of what others say

And where they excel.

We will bring back,

The treasured and hidden ones

Somewhere from a distant rack,

And that’s our new glory,

We will redefine it

And knit a new glittful story...

[I scribbled this poem long ago when I was about to enter into my college life. I have shared it now, after one and a half year later of my joining in college.]

Read More →

Oh Love! You are mine

I wish the sky to show me the Sun today; the sunshine of the first day of February that should have warmth of yours, and the clumsiness that your open hairs had on me. I wish if it could cover my face again. The flowers have already bloomed. I wish them to hold their fragrance good till you hold my hands again. My hands are empty though, but I know you would be holding them wherever you are now. I am waiting for the butterfly you always send, to let me know that you have put your face on my heart again. You had filled the colors daintily on the piece of paper with your lipstick stains in pink; and the nightingale had parceled it to me last year. I am waiting for if she is going to come to me again. I am waiting for if she is going to address me your message –‘Oh Love! You are mine’.

Though you chose to move away, I know it was not by your choice. You said you needed to go, but you had waited for me, I know. I was looking for you too, but couldn’t utter a word about you. The song we composed together stays revived, and it says that you are still here, in my heart where you always hived. This February, I play the tune again that you taught me on my guitar; and it’s my birthday too honey, and I am going to sing Happy Birthday to me myself, because you moved away so far.

How should I blame the fortunes, its him that made us meet; and if we couldn’t stay longer then I must not curse him for this bad treat. I know you would be unhappy too, because you had promised to live with me until I don’t leave. February is just a month, you made its relevance for me indeed. And at this note, I read your note that has your lipstick stains on it and it says ‘Oh Love! You are mine’.

When I walk around in spring, I remember to keep my hold on flowers soft. Tickling my fingers on the rosy petals reminds me of your fingers on mine, and my thumb caressing them slowly. I can’t hurt your hands with my grip hard, and so I touch the flowers soft. Though birds often do the chirruping that may resemble your scolds for me, but I miss the movement of your lips that I used to watch while you kept scolding me.
The tree with our names on it stands intact with his mates even today, but I sit under its shadows alone now. I touch our names engraved on it, and I recall how a girl proposed a boy- ‘Oh Love! You are mine; forever would you be my Valentine?’

[For We Have a Story]

Read More →

My Folded Tongue

Talking with people in general, and speaking in front of group of people, how do you take these two different things? Pardon me if I quoted the same thing and called them to be different. But I consider them to be two separate areas that have significance in each case to be different from the other. We basically do the talking with people to let them know what we want them to know, things we would like to share, a typical discussion we would like to hold. Keeping everything inside our heart is not an easy task and so most of us need to speak with someone. Now where does this speaking in front of people stands for? I suppose speaking in front of people is a more official template, where measurements of your flow of words have serious importance, and you need to clarify yourselves and things you are discussing about. It is a more responsible way to express the matters. People may cross question you and you will need to clarify them over and over again. Now when you meet your dear ones what do you do? Do you speak out as if you are in front of people or is it the normal talking that you do?

I had always thought I am in a habit where I talk less. Recently I have realized that whenever I started the talks, I kept switching in between the shoes of the talking, and of the speaking. Why does this happen that even in friendly talks, we need to clarify ourselves, we need to give a proof of holding the way we talked. I looked into it, gargled the jug full of thoughts and contemplated few coins that didn't shine. I concluded that though I tend to speak less, but I slip into the boat that sails me off, and I keep throwing the words with every push on my oars. There should be a proper proportion of what you need to speak and what you actually speak. We must not let ourselves flow by the stream of emotions. If your boat slips off the coast into the sea then you need to step into the water to bring it back on the sands. It need not be mentioned how worse it can be if someone speaks unprecedentedly. You can’t do more good to him by discussing more than what he expects you to do. Being diplomatic is the best option left with us to continue being on the safe side and to prevent hearts to disassemble. This is the professional way of dressing ourselves. And I am trying to suit myself the best way in my professional field. This is just an experimental proposition by me, your views may vary. I have guilt if I hurt someone with my over explanatory talks without any need at all. 

Read More →

Did You Know?

The more I know, 
The less it seems what I know.
And when I have known 
All what I wanted to know, 
I see there is lot more to know 
That I never thought I would ever know.


But I know, 
I cant stop; I have to let you know
Lots of things you never cared to know. 
Few things I missed  too I know, 
Where you are weak you too even know. 
And new things that you know, 
You should share to make us know, 
If we missed them but didn't know. 


Feel my words to know, 
how urgently we need  this to know. 
This is about the Knowledge my friends;
The more you know, 
The less it seems what you know.

Read More →

My College Life - Phase 1

10^th of August 2010, the day was. We had our orientation ceremony at college’s auditorium. From the next day our classes were to begin. I was late by two days. I couldn’t attend the orientation day neither could I attend the first class of my first semester. I came to know about that orientation ceremony when my mates narrated me later. Few called it boring, like every auditorium function that I am seeing since then, but few called that very much fascinating it was. I can understand; college organizes a function and that also to welcome the first years, so they are most likely going to like it, not because it is good at entertaining them or pertaining to their academics but because of the zeal and energy first year has. I couldn’t be there to watch so I shall not comment much on it. 'BCET' printed on a pen we got, and a letter from our director. The letter had a context in which he told us not to be oversensitive. It did contain few things more, but this very one I can’t forget anyhow, at least after seeing whatever I have seen till now in college.

That was not the first time when I was to live away from home. I was in Bansal Classes, Kota, for one year. Preparations and attention towards my goal couldn’t lead me to glory. I dreamt of ‘Kharagpur’ and fell in ‘Durgapur’ at last. I was very shy to accept that I was there in Kota when people in college asked me where I did the preparation. Not shy but very much shameful I used to feel talking about it. Now I have learnt to accept my defeat.  And I don’t hesitate telling them. It is not that now I have turned shameless. It is so because I have learnt to accept the truth.

There was one thing that worried me the most. I had never shared my room with anybody. I am doing that very well now. But then things were different; I was different. I was not sure of how I would be adjusting with someone I didn’t know, with someone whose nature I was not sure of what kind it was. I met him in the evening, his name is Sheikh Nehar, and he is still my roommate. He is a decent guy. I never had anything to complain about him the entire first year. There are several memorable moments that we have seen together, and we are still seeing.:)
After I settled my bags and baggage in my wardrobe, I went for a shower. The journey of 1147 miles was very much tiring and I was almost sapped out. I thought of having a shower. I can’t figure out what actually was over me then. I entered the bathroom and I cried. I cried loud in shower but not loud enough to get heard outside. I was missing my mom, my dad. I was thinking where I had reached. It was not worth for what I did. There were so many things for which I found myself culprit. Water splashes mingled with my tears and tried to lessen its presence, and then entered a silent part of me into me, that did the secret discussions whenever I was lonely. That silent part is still within me...

Read More →

The Butterfly

On an ivory shade with some brown threaded marks; masked is my body meek and weak, popped out into two bright wing arcs.

And on my wings azure, lie mustered shapes and some tiny little dots; some lucid little hills and some round yellowish sprouts.

I never knew how I looked and what amativeness I had, until you came into my life with my image in your blue eyes clad.

I surmise my colors are no more blazoned; I haven’t seen myself since you had left, my charm left too with my mirror embossed on your eyes pinioned.

Now in the silence of my solitariness few chirruping I hear; what do they say, I can’t make out its meaning neither you can hear it clear.

On dry tongue of mine your sweetness is still alive; a flavor not to forget from our nibbling kisses; the scent of your embrace around my life.

How we lived together is a distant memory dainty; my hold on you and yours on mine; exchange of our gestures in doziness of wine.

Nowhere to live I have now but in memories of you, and in all those moments where we were together-a colored me & a colored you.

Lie they say that the most beautiful I am, nature’s worthy gift & spring’s charm I am; Truth I say that without you a dead musk I am, a bleached spot with no shine I am.

And before I die, a glimpse of yours I need; my last breath shall be the aroma of my love, of my lovely butterfly.

(©) ANSHUL GAUTAM'S

Read More →

Shubho Sankranti

“Oh! Crayons work it seems, green white yellow and red; swaying, flying and quarrelling on the blue bed...Kites they are; happiness bizarre….”

Few days back, while strolling on the terrace I watched closely our neighbor kids playing around with their kites. With colorful designs, imprints new and their long jazzy tail, and tied with sharp manja everybody was keen towards the sky. Watching their colorful fight up above in the sky, I wrote a few lines and updated on Facebook; a part of which I mentioned above in quotes. I wish if I could also fly kites. I never learned how to, excuses for it are lame and I won’t mention them here. But by just watching them I feel it must be enjoyable to hold yourself a little high, and control your grooves with competent skills you apply.

Makar Sankranti is near. Not near, it is just here in fact. On 14th of January, we will be celebrating this festival. Another important festival of India, another credit worthy that makes India a colorful country. Color signifies variations of shades, a visual attribute of things from the light they emit. :) And this holds so true for India.
Makar Sankranti is celebrated for various reasons, in innumerable ways depending upon the location, cultural background and climatic conditions within India. It is observed as a harvest festival. Offerings and prayers to the Lord for the better harvest of crops is observed. Apart from this, Makar Sankranti also stands for movement of the Sun from Tropic of Capricorn to Tropic Cancer. In fact the term Sankranti stands for this very transmigration of the Sun. According to the Hindu mythology, period after mid-December is said to be inauspicious. No sacred rituals or holy practices are recommended during this period. Makar Sankranti brings end to this inauspicious phase and fetches good fortunes. :)
Happiness to have entered into the auspicious season calls for celebration. And to celebrate, the way shall be yours, this is what I recommend. :D However the customary forms of celebration include flying kites, preparation of sweets and several dishes. Sweets made from ‘Til’ and jaggery are known for this festival. And do you know the importance of Til? January is too cold and eating Til will keep you warm. :) 

We have given various names to Makar Sankranti, Lohri, Maghi, Bihu, Pongal. Though each part of India has a different name for it, a different taste to add, a different cultural background at play, but you know the fervor of felicity and happiness is everywhere sound and profound. And happiness gets more with sharing. And I share with you here. Happy Makar Sankranti to all of you. :)

Our family has something more to celebrate. Tomorrow, that is on 13th of January it’s my Papa’s birthday. So there is an added bonus for us. And while I was typing this I was wondering what shall I be gifting my papa on his birthday? It is very much difficult to decide. I don’t earn. And to buy him something from the money that’s his, I am doing no good. :(
Lots of love, and to be a good son is what I can afford with the best right now. 
I wish if a better term I could use for the word gift, if something special I could add to this;
That better I want to buy, wrapped with smiles hundred, a bundle to unpack the bliss. :) 

Read More →

My Weblog Splendor

I don’t remember when I worked last like the way I have been doing since yesterday. Fingers have seized to themselves and are not listening to what my brain is telling. And my wrist has turned even worse. The prevalent bondage it laid on the mouse is showing its effects now. And the eyes; are they still eyes? I suspect. But I am seeing, my suspicion subsides. But it has gone swollen. Sleep I need.

Actually the New Year resolution that I had recently signed gestured me to bring changes wherever there is stand-still. Most of them I have already worked upon. My blog design was what I had missed. Its design, the widgets it contained; all were the same since I formed my blog. And it is getting more than seven months of my blog’s birth. :D

“I shall change it, the design…mmmmhhhh….Everything”, I committed the crime to myself.

Changing the basic template for your blog is very easy. It won’t give you the pain that I faced. Actually the pains start stagnating once you choose to look for the “best” available “free custom“ template.  I went through hundreds of free templates; found them no good at all.

“Yes! This is the one”…I stopped somewhere. But when I loaded the template what I got was terribly bad. Though the CSS layouts were intact but I didn’t like the way my blog looked overall. I decided to change the basic codes of the templates. Thanks to my best friend, Mr. Google. He was always with me supporting me with cheats and tweaks that most of the time failed to impress me.

Yesterday it ended without any progress. If you call ‘a mess up’ a progress then yes, I had it a lot yesterday.  Few more tweaks, some more tries finally yielded something significant. I redesigned everything; from Photoshopic designing of header/logo to breaking the outer and inner wrapper of the main page; played around with Jquery and JavaScript. It now feels good that it is over finally.

There is still lot to say, but I bind up here. If you will be visiting my blog now, you will notice the changes yourself. Though it pained a lot, but yes it was enjoyable. I learned many things. Things that are part of my subject, but I was missing them. There is still lot more to learn; lot more to earn.

Pains do gains…..I agree. Do you?

Read More →

Welcome To The Real World...

Do you realise your eye brows getting concaved, ears twitching, and larynx ready for vibrations but your brain searching for appropriate words. Even if the brain gets them, still intermits the coordination to prevent you from uttering anything. This situation happens most of the time with me when I need to convey answers to one of the closest friends of mine, who mercilessly spears me with questions. I called ‘Spearing’ because those questions revolve around their personal lives, and giving answers to such, which I impart in form of suggestions, make me feel as if I am interfering with their so happening game.

The game in which we are characters, equipped with powers, weapons and strategies that we gain in the due process ever since the game started. Current status in the game largely depends on us that how well we were playing ever since the commencement. But today, games are never clean.

Read More →

Crinkled Pages From My Diary...

June 20, 2011
6:00 pm

It has been more than two weeks of my stay here in Gujarat, at my home on this holiday. The time flows, I realise this well when I have no work to do, no classes to attend. Here in this small room, sheltered with the hot roof, that often leaks during rain, with blistering sun above it, physically alone all the time, I never find myself alone actually. This is so because of the upheaval of thoughts in my mind, creative, supportive and those which are always difficult to share, you want to set them free but at the same time, you find yourself handcuffed and let them remain inside you.
During this period of my holidays here, today it is the first time that I pushed myself out of my blistering hot room, in search of medications for my sores, that weren’t able to heal, because of their captivity.

Its 6:30 pm, sun is still four fingers above the horizon, and I am strolling down the lanes, learning my familiarity with them, that I gained two years back. I used to come here, same streets, two years back too. But then everything was different. Today, I feel an essence of relieve all around. The feel of cool wind, surpass the somatic senses from my sores.

Breeze, without any lease,
giving me ease,
pains to cease,
modifying my crease.
My mind in muse,
body gone loose,
telling me to stop,
but with a comma, and not a full stop.
I move on, on the pavement drawn,
at the time of dusk, I am seeing my dawn,
picking up the husk, smelling of musk,
I make out, how sturdy the time was,
From Dusk, Till Dawn...

Read More →

Contemplation

I am not a professional writer, not even know how to arrange my words to make them meaningful, and attract the attention of my spectators I suppose. It is very much essential to make people take interest in you, in your point of view. Because if they are not occupied with your representation, they would consider your truth, even your soul feelings, farting and sick, and hence will go away leaving you behind, letting you go dumb, and speechless.
And me being an amateur at writing, it is very much difficult for me to make my friends understand what my silence stands for, although I seldom found people in my life that I dwelt since I was born and till now, for whom I shall entitle them with the tag of the major word “Friends”.
I believe in the fact that shining of eyes always doesn’t signify beauty inside them; it may also be so because of tears that are embedded in them. Not always the tears of joy.
Smile is the best jewel that human can wear to make themselves look lovely. But who cares about the person who suffers so much to get that jewel. And if some how he gets it, still convulses of anguish, in order to let it remain at its place, because it is very much difficult to hide that it is just an imitation.
I have gone tired of my feelings, my sensitiveness towards the actions that play around me, and I suppose that they are getting cancerous. I have gone tired of making out senses about what I did was right or not. It would seem philosophical and will not tally with the mindsets of friends of ours, at the current scenario, where everybody seems to be “overbusy”; although I am afraid if this very word exists or not, but I suppose my learned friends would have got the meaning of what I wished to say.

I never talk. Please mind this thing that I am not saying that I talk less. My “no talk” doesn’t implies that I show rudeness to people, or there is something called unfriendly nature in me. I am a worthy friend, honest, and very much social as well. My so called “No talk” policy is just to keep up myself with what people do, and not to let them know that I am unhappy with what they are doing, and me myself don’t want to hurt them by pointing out the loopholes in their intentions behind doing so. I know you will find this weird, but I can’t help it. The whole system nowadays has undergone such a change where each thing that people do, makes me raise questions with myself and makes my trust upon them go in grave danger.
I take responsibility to reach the Supremo to make my job done, I do all arrangements, I prepare myself in every aspect that seems within my capabilities. But I always fail to make myself prepared to tell lies, to be dishonest at some juncture where it becomes essential for my job to get done. And consequently my job fails. I come back empty handed. I can’t impress my people, because at current course of time, it is very much difficult to impress people by the help of honesty and truth. I have stopped my attempts of getting myself go crooked as I have realised that they can never be embossed in my soul, because it is preoccupied with my firm impression of truth.

Politeness and realisation of obedience by each other in every relationship is very much necessary. But I don’t find this now in this changed world. May be I am wrong because I had been using my heart to observe these things instead of my eyes, powered up by my specs. People do certain things to one another, by the name of prank they call so, declaring their rights to play them on their friends that more often lead to a hitting sensation in their friend’s heart. But none of them enrol themselves into a serious stroll due to such hip hop events. But I do mind such things.
Now I suppose that you would have agnised why I prefer my “No Talk” policy. I can’t change.
Am I wrong if I think this way? Why have my heart and soul teamed up against my brain? Brain is set for current challenges and latest upbringings, but my teamed up heart and soul sing another jargon. Aren’t our people wrong somewhere? And if they are wrong, how do I assume that so many people can be wrong at the same time. Why do people compromise for things that are not right, that are not healthy?
I want to talk. But don’t know how to make myself talk. If my words made some significant meaning to you, then please do give comments.

GOD SHALL BLESS US ALL
Copyright ©
ANSHUL GAUTAM

Read More →